My baby is one.

Technically she won't be one for another 7 hours and 14 mins (as of the time I'm writing this post). I meant to write a post this afternoon while both Juliana and Alivia were napping but I got wrapped up in looking at photos of Juliana's first hours of life. I watched videos of her coming into this world. I looked at the last pictures and videos of us as a family of 3. I listened to Dustin say "it's a girl!" when she was finally out. (Yes ...finally...have you ever pushed a baby out? You know what I mean)

So. My post didn't get written. I know there was a lot I wanted to say. But I'll get to that tomorrow. Right now I want to reminisce. 

This day last year changed our lives forever. Even now as writing this I'm debating with myself; should I write my birth story? Should I just keep this short and sweet? I feel like if I get started I won't be able to stop. And I'm typing this from my phone while laying in bed and it's not the easiest, nor the most comfortable, thing to do. 

Maybe I'll save my birth story for tomorrow. Or another day. 

But at this exact moment last year I was in a hospital bed, complaining to Dustin because the Dr. wouldn't let me go home. Little did I know that we'd be having a baby in a few hours. 

Everyone always says it, and maybe its a cliche but, I can't believe my baby is going to be one year old in the morning! How is this even possible? I know I've been here every day for the last year, I've seen her learning and growing and developing into the cutest little thing but what the hell!? How does time pass so fast??

Here's the last photo of her as an "infant" or a "baby". Who makes up these guidelines anyway. She will always be my baby. 

And who am I kidding. It's not like this photo is going to last until morning. She wakes up every 45 mins allllllll night long. As a matter of fact...I started writing this at 11:15pm. It's 11:35 pm. I laid her down at 10:50pm and she's already awake again. 

That's me. Rocking her PNP with my foot trying to get her back to sleep. :)

Happy new year and happy birthday my littlest one. 

Juliana is 10 Months!

My littlest little,

How are you already 10 months old? I feel like just last month we brought you home from the hospital. Yet at the same time I feel like I've known you forever, how is this possible?
Over the last month you have changed a lot but at the same time there are many things that are the same as the day you came home with us.

You're very determined. When you want something or if you're in the middle of doing something, no one had better get in your way. It's funny to see such a little person be so specific about what they want. You will grunt and practically throw yourself at something if you want it. Or point. You point at everything and you're really good at pointing to things we ask you to. You will put your little hands into fists and yell when something doesn't go your way. We know you're annoyed but it sure is cute.

You're very smart. So smart. Too smart? Doesn't every parent think that about their child? You know when you're not supposed to have something. You'll look at me and see if I'm watching you. The other day I told you not to put something in your mouth (which I say about 8,483 times a day) and you scooted your little body around 180* so that your back was to me, looked over your shoulder, then hunched over your prized position so that I wouldn't take it from you. When you're sister takes something out of your hands or grabs something you were going for first, you immediately look at me. You give me this look like "Did you see that?! What are you going to do about it!?" I love it.
Same thing goes though if you try reaching for something she has. You'll tentatively reach for it while looking at me to see if I'll stop you. Which I do. And usually you'll just complain a little bit, sometimes you'll find something else to play with and sometimes...it's a full on meltdown. BUT...you won't take it out of her hands. When you're sister is feeling very generous though she'll just give it to you. :-)

You're funny. You love teasing us. Over the last couple weeks we can really play with you and see a sneaky side to you. One that's so playful and happy. I'll look at you at say "Hey! You get back here!" and you'll giggle and take off, then stop and pretend to go again until I say it. It's so sweet and there is definitely a twinkle in your eye when you do it.

You're very snuggly. You always want to snuggle with me but at night, right before we go to bed and we're trying to read stories with Alivia, you start wanting to hug and hang on her. Of course this is the end of the day and Alivia is tired and not always in the most snugly mood when it comes to little sisters. But boy do you try! Two nights ago you followed her all around her bedroom trying so hard to get a hold of her. It was sweet and sad at the same time. She just wasn't in the mood. :-)

You adore your big sister, and she's pretty fond of you too. You follow her around the house like a little puppy. Whatever she's playing, eating, drinking, looking at...you have to too. You give her kisses and hugs and try holding her hand. And (unless it's bedtime) Alivia is right there talking about what a sweet, cute, lovey baby you are. She loves when you give her kisses and will say "Ahhh she just gave me a kiss! How cute!"

You love to eat. Pretty much anything I give you you'll go to town on. I can't really think of one specific thing you won't eat. When I put more than one type of food on your tray you're really good at picking out what you want to eat at that moment and will leave all the rest until you're ready for it. And usually you'll end up eating it all. There are times though that you'll pick out the one thing you want and then will throw everything else on the floor. Typical baby.  You're really loving bananas right now too. You'll put down a while banana if we let you!

Speaking of throwing things on the floor. One of your favorite games ever is throwing your washcloth on the floor when I'm cleaning you up after a meal. Seriously. Over and over and over and over. You never get tired of it. We once played that game for 20 mins and you would have kept going but I was getting worn out! But you laugh so hard when I say "HEY!" as I'm picking it up for the 100th time. So it's worth it!

If we laugh or sneeze or cough you'll mimic it. And then you'll keep laughing because you find it hilarious to copy us. When you drink water or even just want water you make a sound like an adult would after taking a nice cold drink on a hot day. That "ahhh". Does that make sense? And you do it after every sip of water or milk. It cracks us up! I'm still working on teaching you signs and you know them but don't use them yet. But you make it very clear when you want a drink of something because you do that "Ahh" sound. We love it.

Grandma Green bought you and Alivia a tent and you will go in and out of that thing all day long. And it's fast. You're in there for about 3 seconds and then you pop back out again. Another game you never get tired of! You also got to carve your first pumpkin this year, paint one and go to your first birthday party (Happy Birthday Quinn!)

The biggest change this month is that you're walking!!! You started taking 1-2 steps a few weeks ago and then 2 days you did 4 steps. Then suddenly about 3 days ago you took off. In the morning you were doing pretty good. Getting up and walking around. You'd topple over a few times but then right back up you went. By evening you were all. over. the. house! And you don't stop! You're everywhere. If I'm cooking in the kitchen you'll just walk back and forth from the kitchen to the living room repeatedly. And yes I'm probably biased but you have the cutest walk ever. I know other babies do this too because I've seen it but it's just so adorable. You're little arms are just hanging down by your sides and you very very very slightly hunch your shoulders forward and it's so cute to watch. Usually you want something in your hands though so when you do you have each hand holding onto something. Want to know what your favorite thing to carry around is? A washcloth. Most notably the washcloth that you continue to throw on the floor while I'm trying to clean you up. You'll just carry that thing all over the house.

There's that washcloth! As well as a diaper changing pad...

Taking a couple steps, just days before you took off!

On nights that we do baths it's always after dinner and this past month you've learned how to get all the way back to my bathroom for bath time. I'll say "bath time bath time" in a sing song voice and you stop whatever you were doing and you book it to the bathroom! Before you were crawling back there now you walk. And fast! You love your baths!

We're still working on sleep...you're an amazing little person Juliana and I love you to the moon and back but my goodness the sleep is something pretty awful. As a matter of fact I've had to get up 3 times to put you back to sleep since I sat down to write this and I hear you stirring on the monitor again. You sleep in my room in a pack-n-play on my side of the bed. You wake up about every 45 mins. :-) It's a lot of fun. You do end up in bed with me which is absolutely fine. I love co-sleeping...if you'd sleep ha! Even right next to me you wake up all night long. But I have to say....you have become SO cuddly in the mornings. You will flip and flop all over the place landing right on me every time. If I try to move away even 6 inches I wake up and you're RIGHT in my face. Snuggled up as close as you can get. The nights are sooooo long but boy are you a sweetie in the morning.

40 weeks old

Well there's a book for you for 10 months old! So many new things happening and I love documenting them for us all. I hope it's something you'll enjoy looking back on.

First Halloween!

I love you little one so much, Happy 10 months baby girl!

Toddler Fashion Tuesday; NaBloPoMo

Oops. So it's a few days late. But this was too cute not to share. 

<3 br="">

Operation Pre-Winter Simplicity; NaBloPoMo

I think I did pretty good with blogging most day's in October. I need to double check but I'm pretty sure I blogged more day's than not, so more than half the month. And the month's not over yet.
It's just been busy. And I've been tired. Plus I got hit with mastitis and pretty bad clogged ducts so I've been wiped out to say the least.

But onward and upward. Right?

Anyway. I've been reading a book called Simplicity Parenting. I've been reading it for months now and again the library isn't too happy with me. They should have a longer check out time for parents because everyone knows there's no time to read. I'm not even a 1/4 through it but I already love what it's saying. It's in line with what my husband and I have always wanted to do anyway.

More minimalist, more simple, less cluttered, not so "commercialized" lol.

We live in a pretty small town home with a 1 car garage. There are 2 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms. We're feeling pretty cramped in here. It's not that we can't all live here comfortably. I have no issue with my girls sharing a room but it'd be nice to spread out a bit more. (They won't be sharing a room until the little one finally sleeps a bit better so she's still in our room.)

If you do some reading about a more minimalist lifestyle, if you read about child development, if you read about stress, anxiety, being overwhelmed, you'll find that visual clutter pops up in all of these topics. I'm not talking about wanting to do an extreme sweep of our home and get rid of everything but there is far stuff in this house than we need right now.

So I have a goal. By the first day of winter, I want my home more organized. We have stuff we don't use and that never gets seen. I have things I'm attempting to sell that we don't need anymore and I either want it sold or donated by winter. There are also some cleaning projects I have in mind; underneath both of our bathroom sinks,...it's bad people. When I got to about 7.5 months pregnant with my littlest one I stopped even attempting to bend over and put things away. They just got thrown in there. And then I had the baby, and, well...I have 2 kids so things still just get thrown in there because I don't have time haha! I want to go through my kitchen and re-organize the cabinets. When we first moved in here it was just my husband and myself. Now we have two little people running/crawling around and our needs have really changed. I'd also like to clear more things off the counters. You can ask my mother...I hate appliances on the counter that only get used once in a while.

I'd like to have these things done by winter because I know there are going to be many days that it's too cold/snowy/wet/slushy/windy/miserable to venture outside, even to the car, and we'll be cooped up in the house. I'd like to not feel like I'm suffocating on those days because I love being outside and out and about. It would be nice to be comfortable in our home and not overwhelmed with stuff.

Hmmm...Maybe I'll bump it up 11 days and say by December 11th. Since the baby I brought home from the hospital 2 seconds ago will be turning 3 (WHAT?!??!?!) mid December, and I'm sure she'll be getting more things for her birthday, it'd be nice to already have gotten rid of the unused stuff before hand.

There you have it. Let's see if I can stick with it. I'm excited too to finish this book. Once I'm done I'll do a review of it here in case anyone else is interested in it. And to me this is about more than just organizing and cleaning up. It's about being happy and comfortable and not stressed over visual stimuli all day long.

Now I need to see if there's some way I can create a running/live list on my blog here to update and cross things off of?

Catching Up; NaBloPoMo

Well it's been a few days. It wasn't because I got tired of writing, I am really enjoying getting to my computer every day and finding some time to get my thoughts out there. Where ever there is. Who's reading this anyway? Feel free to leave comments! :-)

I've simply run out of time and been tired. It's been a busy few days and I'm to blame for it. Actually Fall is to blame for it. It's just been so incredibly nice out and I love being outside with the girls. I had our calendar pretty full last week with visits to different farms and pumpkin carvings. Plus I planned out our week of meals which took me forever this week as I was trying to find some new recipes to try out and I haven't been feeling all that great. I'm having some breastfeeding related issues and I think it's making me more sleepy and possibly even sick. So finding the time and energy lately to keep up with posting every day this month just didn't happen.

But here I am! I'm not giving up. I've missed sitting here writing. Even if it's just for me. It makes me feel better. There's a lot of thoughts in this head people and they can't all be in there alone, it gets overwhelming. ;-)

What I'd like to do now is head back over to Blogher.com and finish up some of the prompts that I've missed. If you're interested here is the direct link for the prompts. I'm going to use the ones I've missed as more of a Q&A. Mostly because some of these prompts wouldn't elicit a full post from me and some I just don't care about.

What dish did you dread being served as a kid? Did I answer this already? Lima beans. I hate lima beans. But we found out I am allergic to them so luckily my mom didn't insist on my eating them. Onions. I still hate them but I've been cooking with them so that Alivia and Juliana have an opportunity to eat them. But as far as a full dish...I'd have to say meatloaf. Ugh, just the name...

Is your least favourite food from childhood still your least favourite dish? Yes. You will never catch me eating meatloaf. Ever.

What was the first thing you ever learned how to cook?  I don't know really. I'd have to ask my mother. See if she can bring back a memory for me. I remember making burritos at my dad's house because that was pretty much a staple there but it wasn't really cooking per say. It was chopping up the tomatoes, heating up the beans, getting the cheese, sour cream and lettuce ready and filled in the tortillas. I guess I was allowed to make the ground beef. I remember that now that I type this. 

Have you ever invented your own recipe? What was your first one? No. I've altered recipes plenty of times. I usually stick to an exact recipe the first or second time I make it but generally after that I change it up to what works for us and our tastes...or what's on hand. I wonder if I'd like to make my own. It seems like nothing "new" could really be made right? I mean,...hasn't it all been done? Maybe I should look into that.

What do you consider your most successful dish? Oh,...maybe the chili I blogged about earlier this month. Do side dishes count? I think I'm pretty good at Thanksgiving and Christmas side dishes. I'm always looking for something different for our family. I got a lot of compliments on a sweet potato casserole a couple years back as well as some really good cranberry sauce. There's a few more, though I'd need to check Pinterest because that's where I've saved those meals.

What do you wish you knew how to make? Cheesecake. I've always wanted to know how to make cheesecake and for some reason I've been intimidated by it. I think it's the pan. The spring form pan.
I we registered for 2 of those pans for our wedding, 6 years ago, ... I know all of these questions are about cooking and cheesecake is to bake so to keep on theme I'd have to say salmon. I wish I could not screw up salmon. It's incredibly rare for me not to over do it and it comes out very dry.

Now things get weird over on Blogher prompts all of a sudden it's about gossip for this week? I've not followed all the way through on a month of posting with Blogher yet so maybe it's common for a completely random break away from topic but I thought it was strange lol.

That's where I'll stop for today. I feel good that I was able to get here and do this.
By the way, Wednesday is National Cheesecake Day so watch for a video coming up on my YouTube channel on that. And if you'd like to see the videos of us at the pumpkin patches that have kept me so busy head on over to my channel!

I'm still here!!

I haven't given up on writing this month. It's been a very very busy last couple days.

I missed my post for Toddler Fashion yesterday but I'll get it up today. 

I'm also battling an over full computer which isn't allowing me to do a damn thing. ... I'm posting from my phone right now. 

I will make up for it with extra posts!

:)

Alivia @ 34 months old...

Yes I find it ridiculous to say she is "34 months old" and no I don't say that when someone asks me how old my daughter is. But for the sake of this blog and me (trying to) writing a post each month about how she's changed it makes sense. So just relax...it's going to be ok...(Ashley :-)  )

Alivia,

My dear sweet little adorable Alivia. You are getting SO BIG. You are growing up so fast and I just can't believe how much you change every single day. Honestly, there is something new you say or do or a new way you act, each and every day that just amazes me.

At Cyprus's 5th birthday party

You're not quite 3 years old yet and already you are the best big sister ever. You take amazing care of your little Juliana, you're patient with her, you share with her and you say how much you love her every day. I hope this continues on because it's truly the most precious thing I've ever witnessed. There are certainly moments throughout the day where you do want her to play with your toys, and that's ok. Or times when she pulls your hair or pokes you in the eye and you yell out at her but you're two and a half years old...this is normal and common and absolutely understandable. Plus she's 9 months old and doesn't know what (most the time) she's even doing when she grabs at you.

First day of fall (helping her put her hat back on)

Just today before your nap, as I changed your diaper, she reached over to touch your face and she poked you right in the eye. You got upset for about 3 seconds, because it did hurt!, and then you said this:
"That's ok Juliana, accidents happen because you're just a baby and you're still learning how to be gentle"

....I mean really? And that's verbatim...I wrote it down immediately.

You've just recently had an incredible growth spurt as well. It seems as if over night non of your clothes fit you. Your pants are too short, your pj's are too snug and non of your shoes fit! You went from having an overabundance of clothes to choose from to a very limited amount that actually look comfortable. Today we went to Target and I put a dress on you that I just bought a few months ago. As you were running to the bathroom (because you're always running) I noticed how short the dress had gotten! A woman standing next to me said how cute you were. Obviously I agree :-)

Things you like right now:

• Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood and Curious George. You don't get to watch very much TV but when you do that's what you pick. You also love watching "Tiny Babies" which is a vlog we watch on YouTube together (if I haven't already watched it while you were napping...yes...while you were napping. Things do happen during that time and I'm not ready for the day you figure that out haha)
• You LOVE reading books. Any and all books. Right now we're still on a Curious George kick as well as Ladybug Girl. But there are a wide variety of books that we read every day and you love going to the library to pick out more.
• You love helping me cook. Even if it's just spreading almond butter on your bread. As long as you're right next to me, and you have a hand in it, you're happy. You pull one of our ridiculously heavy chairs across the kitchen floor and up to the counter. You're excellent at peeling any fruit or vegetable I give you. You can grate cheese, lemons, garlic. You crack your own eggs. You mix batter. You pour all the ingredients we need into the bowl. You're really quite the little helper. You're begging me to let you by the stove but I'm not ready for that yet. I'm too afraid you'll burn yourself on something. Maybe in a couple years little love.
• If you could spend all day outside you would. We go to the park about 5 times a week, walk to the mail box everyday (even on Sundays) we sit on our deck and play every day. We sit out on a blanket in the grass and relax in the shade of a tree by our front door. You love watering the tomato plant and splashing in the water from the faucet.
• You love, love, love playing baby dolls...I don't think I've ever played baby dolls this much in my life...and I have 3 little sisters. You pretty much reenact everyday life with them and we are always playing with you.
• You also love Little People by Fisher Price. You've collected quite the little army of people and they are also played with every day.
• You ask me now to put your hair in braids or a pony tail!

You like to sing and dance. Right now your favorite song is "3 Little Birds" by Bob Marley.
You always want me with you. Every day for about the last month you've started saying "I don't want you to go anywhere ever mommy. Not to the store. Not to the library. I just want you to stay with me forever."  You've also been telling me at nap or bed time, when we're giving "baby hug and a kiss" "I'm going to hold onto you forever. Until the sun comes up! It's going to be a long long time mommy"

Talk about melting my heart.

The other night Juliana was crawling all around the hall way while I was singing you songs for bed. Usually I either hold you both at the same time (yes this is very difficult!) or I'm holding you on my hip but this night I was holding you like a baby and swaying you back and forth. Your eyes started getting really heavy and I told you that if I kept rocking you I'd end up rocking you to sleep. Then Juliana wandered out of eye sight so I had to step around the corner and corral her back to the hallway. You looked up at me and said "Can you do that?" I asked what you meant and you just said "Can you do that sometime mommy. Can you rock me to sleep?" Goodness just typing it out makes me get all teary. I just can't even handle the sweetness! It's so amazing that I used to rock you to sleep every single night. That was how you feel asleep. And then things change, we alter what we do, you get older, another baby comes along and before I know it my little girl is asking with awe in her voice if mommy can actually rock you to sleep. It somewhat breaks my heart that I don't anymore, and that you'll never remember when I did.

OK...must change the subject now or I'll never finish writing this for I can't see through the tears! :-)

You're doing great with learning numbers. You can count to 18 most days but sometimes you'll go weeks where the numbers get jumbled up after 6 or 10. Its cute listening to you count. You're not as excited about the alphabet anymore. You used to sing your ABC's all day long but you've lost interest in that at the moment. You still know all the letters if I point them out to you it's just not on your radar right now.

Stickers are a big hit as is play dough.

And you're almost done potty training. I'm hoping that actually moves along here a bit better.

Little one you're my favorite Alivia and I'm excited to see what new changes are in store for us over the next month!

Love,
Mommy

Fall Pictures... in a Cemetery?

About 2 weeks ago Dustin and I took the girls up to Central City to gamble for a few hours.
HA...just kidding. But there is a grave yard up there that is actually very beautiful and a couple years ago we took some pictures up there with Alivia so we decided to head back up this year and get a few of all of us. We were heading up on our own so we had to get creative with taking a "family" picture but we did manage to snap two. And keep in mind this is using a cell phone so quality could be better.

This cemetery dates back to the 1860's and has beautiful old wrought iron gates, marble headstones and beautiful aspen trees. One of the saddest things we notice while walking through here is how young so many of the "occupants" were when they died. Some merely months old, most small children. And possibly even more sad is that you see a lot of young siblings together there.

If you're ever in the area and have a chance to drive around this is a beautiful place to get out and explore a bit. Keep in mind you are in a cemetery and please be respectful of the area.

Here are the photos we took this Fall. Hope you enjoy!

The sun had just come out and was right in our eyes!